Flawed
by Miss Matched
Summary: It was only a matter of time before Helga would see the beauty behind the flaws and scars of life, Arnold's and her own. Chapter 7: LostFoundRunHide
1. Prologue: Open Wounds

Flawed

By Miss Matched

Prologue: Open wounds

  


Disclaimer: I own nothing. W00T!

  


  


  


"It's just not fair!" The young blonde moaned, pounding on the pillow that she had in her lap. It's soft, gray surface gave in with every blow. The woman across from her took notes as this happened.

It was a fair afternoon in Hillwood, a city that had seen it's fair share of gloomy days, like the days where it was nearly wiped off the map by a greedy company. Days like those were a lesson for the people in Hillwood, that made fair days such as these all the more sweet. A warm breeze wafted in from the open window of Dr. Bliss', a child physiologist, office. Papers swirled and danced around the office until the woman, Dr. Bliss, closed the window with a snap. The young girl, her patient, took no notice of this. The physiologist sighed, familiar with this patient and the poor girl's troubles.

"What's not fair, Helga?" she asked calmly, looking back at the blonde. Helga, as she was called, refused to answer, choosing instead to look down at the mashed gray pillow in her hands. "You're going to have to tell me, Helga. You know that."

Helga sighed, and threw the pillow off to her side. "It's just, now that Arnold know's everything about, well, everything..." She pulled out another pillow, and sent it flying across the room. "He's acting like nothing happened. I mean, that's what I wanted, isn't it? And yet, I want him to hold me," when she said this, her expression became more docile, and her voice lost it's bite, "And tell me that he loves me, and that nothing I said was in vain. But alas, how can someone as imperfect as I win his affections?"

Dr. Bliss pushed a stray piece of thick, brown hair away from her face, pondering over her patient's words. "Nobody's perfect, Helga" She reminded her gently.

"Arnold is." Helga replied earnestly. "Always giving out advice, always a shoulder to lean on, someone to rely on. He's so rooted for someone our age, so mature, so...." Realizing that she was rambling, she shut up. 

"You know, Helga, everyone has his or her faults." An idea popped into the good doctor's mind. "Why, I doubt you even know him that well." She said, writing that thought down. 

"What do you mean?!" Helga asked, infuriated, "I've known him fully two thirds of my young life!!!"

"And yet you still think he's perfect? Why, I think you should get to know him better, Helga." She paused, in thought. "In fact, I challenge you to do that this week. Get to know Arnold. Because you never know, once you see his flaws... you may realize that he's not so special after all." She watched as Helga became livid, just as she expected her to.

"I'll show you wrong, Doc. I accept your challenge. Arnold is perfect, and sweet, and wonderful, and soon _you'll_ know it too!" And with that, she stormed out the door.

Dr. Bliss watched the open door for a few moments as her angry patient left. She smiled to herself, taking a sip out of her coffee mug. It was only a matter of time before Helga would see the beauty behind the flaws and scars of life, Arnold's and her own.


	2. Chapter One: Rubbing Salt in the Wound

Flawed

By Miss Matched

Chapter One: Rubbing Salt in the Wound

  


Disclaimer: I own nothing. W00T! Oh, I especially don't own the confession scene, which I'm adding in here. I figured that some people hadn't seen the movie, or maybe forgot exactly all that happened, plus, I wanted a chance to get into Helga's head in that moment. I did some research online, so I think these words are pretty accurate. Well, up to a point. Um, er...

  


Authors Note: Information on a lame idea I had at the end of the chapter. Trust me, it's semi cool. Oh and _stuff in italics_ are thoughts. Yup. They are. Uh huh.

  


  


  


The wind whipped around furiously, making her brown trench coat flap in the breeze. The love of her life looked back at her, confused. "Helga?!" He asked, shocked, "You're Deep Voice?" Helga closed her eyes, obviously shaken for a moment. She hadn't wanted him to know. Helping him in the shadows was always so much easier, because her motives would never be questioned. Jumping off of the stilts she was wearing, she answered him. 

  


"Looks like it." She answered, guiltily. 

  


Arnold stared at her, and shook his head. "But I don't get it. How come you couldn't just tell me what you knew? Why did you have to make up this.... crazy secret identity?" 

  


"No reason." She responded quickly, almost too quickly. Truth was, there were so many reasons. Sure, when she found out that the new mallplex was going to make her father rich, she hadn't minded if the neighborhood was torn down or not. She knew, though, that money wasn't everything, and how much the whole crummy neighborhood meant to her beloved. There was only one thing she could do... and she was doing it.

  


"But Helga," Arnold countered, still confused, "You just risked everything to help me save the neighborhood!"

  


_"You haven't quite saved it yet"_ Helga thought to herself, but then said aloud, "So what's your point?"

  


"That's a pretty amazing thing to do for someone you claim to hate." 

  


  


_"Oh, please, no... don't do this..." _She begged Arnold in her mind. "Yeah, well, I'm a pretty amazing person, football head!"

  


"But I though you were on your dad's side." He stated, "I though you were going to get rich off the whole deal."

  


"Money isn't everything" She muttered in response. _"But you are..."_

  


"Helga, why did you do this?" He was determined, and it shone in his eyes. Helga cringed. He wouldn't do it, would he? He wouldn't make her confess... he couldn't! She wasn't ready!

  


"Okay..." She searched for a decent answer, "I love a good mystery?" 

Arnold didn't buy it. He was pleading with her now. "Oh, c'mon, what's the real reason?"

  


"Oh, I don't know Arnold," She sighed. "I guess maybe I took pity on you and your stupid friends." She turned around to face the ledge of the rooftop that they were standing on. The sky was a deep ebony black with beautiful, diamond like stars in the sky. Had she her poetry notebook now, she would compare those stars to her beloved's eyes. _"Stop it!"_ she mentally scolded herself, _"Keep thinking like that, and he's bound to wrangle the truth out of you!"_

  


The usually docile Arnold continued to pry, "Well, why?" He asked. 

  


_"Why can't he just say 'Whatever you say, Helga', like he usually does?"_ She stalled for a moment, " because....beacuse, maybe I don't hate you as much as I thought, okay?" Laughing shortly and nervously, she continued, "I guess I might even kinda... like you a little, Heck you might even say I like you a lot!" She laughed a little more, rubbing her arm nervously with a gloved hand. 

  


"You do?!" Arnold was taken aback. "You did this for **me**?!"

  


"That's right hair-boy," She answered defiantly, _"I mean, criminy, what else are you supposed to do when someone you love is in danger?"_ She thought to herself. Pausing for a moment, she looked up at Arnold. His eyes were as wide as saucers. Had she just said that last part out loud?

  


"Love?" He gasped, looking back at her. She knew what he was thinking. He was wondering how this bully, this cruel, unlovable, unfeeling person could ever even begin to comprehend the meaning of love. 

  


"You heard me, pal! I love you! That's right, _I_ **_LOVE YOU_**!" Helga exclaimed. It felt so wonderful to get those words off of her chest, to finally give him a chance to know how she felt. "Who else do you think has been stalking you night and day, building shrines to you in a closet, filling volumes with poems about you? I love you Arnold! I've always loved you! Ever since I laid eyes on your stupid football head!" She took a deep breath and stared him right in the eyes, "From that moment and every moment since, I've lived and breathed for you, _dreamed_ of the moment I could finally tell you my secret feelings and could grab you and kiss you and- Helga grabbed Arnold by both arms, but he shoved her away.

  


"That's** _it_**?" He asked, angerly. "What? You thought you could just waltz up to me, and tell me this, and think that I'd love you back?" Helga backed up in shock. "Well, I don't. I **hate** you, Helga G. Pataki. How could you think that you'd have a chance with me?" He grabbed her by the collar of her jacket, and pushed her up to the edge of the building ledge. Then he turned on his heel and walked away.

  


"But, but," She protested as he left, "The neighborhood!"

  


"I don't need you to help me, Helga." He responded coldly. She looked him in the eyes, and saw fear. He was afraid of her? What was happening? "Goodbye."

  


"No!!! Don't leave me here!" She screamed as he walked away. But it was too late, and he was gone. Guards swarmed the top of the Future Tech Industry building, and closed in on Helga. The world swam in front of her eyes, and then went black.

  


  


"No, please!" Helga called, reaching out. Mirium Pataki grabbed her daughter's hand and stroked it. 

  


"She's been like this for a few hours, Dr. Bliss." Mirium explained, motioning to her daughter, sleeping fitfully. She might have not been too good of a mother, but she knew when her baby was in trouble. The doctor next to her sighed.

"I'm going to wake her up, now. It seems like whatever dream she was experiencing is ending." Dr. Bliss responded. "Um, does Helga have a radio?"

"Huh? Oh, yes, over there." Mirium said, pointing to a corner in the room. Dr. Bliss removed a rag doll from in front of it, and then turned it on at a low volume. Classical music filled the room. Slowly, she turned the volume up. Helga moaned, and flipped in her bed. 

  


"No, Ar..." She yelled out again, but woke up before she could finish. She opened her eyes in relief. 

  


"Thank goodness!" Mirium exclaimed. "Are you okay now, Helga?"

  


In response, Helga screamed.

  


Dr. Bliss put a hand on Helga's shoulder. "Don't worry, Helga. Your father's at work. He doesn't know about any of this. Just... Just take deep breaths, okay?" Helga wordlessly obeyed.

  


"Now then, your mother called you in late to school, but I'm afraid you will have to go today. We made a bet, remember?"

  


Helga sighed, and wrung her hands. 

  


"And Helga," Dr. Bliss added before she left the room, "Come talk to me after school. I have a feeling we'll be talking about a certain dream of yours."

  


  


  


AN: Ladies and gentlemen! It is my pleasure to announce the 2002 Hey Arnold Fanfiction Awards!!! 

  


Random person: What is she talking about?!

  


Okay, here's the skinny. Below all this information will be a form. You must, and I repeat, **_must_** fill out the form in it's entirity, and email it to miss_matched@hotmail.com

  


Random person: Psshaw. So, what you're saying is that the only people who can vote are the ones who read your stories?

  


Nonsense! I encourage everyone to plug this in their authors notes. No, not my stories, just the contest. Include my email address so they can email their favorites to me. Heck, even post the form and my email address at the bottom of your story. I would appreciate very much!

  


Random person: Can I vote more then once?

  


I would rather you only vote once for every section. Once the ballot comes out, all votes before hand are null and void, and you may vote again.

  


Random person: I love a fanfic that was written prior to 2002. May I please nominate it?

  


Well, only if it has been updated in 2002. Next year, the awards will be only for 2003 stories, and so on and so forth.

  


Random Person: Well, I like a story that's Action/Adventure and Drama, so I wanna submit that for Action/Adventure. Can I submit it for Drama too?

  


Sure can. If it has two genres, then it's eligible for both awards.

  


Random person: Well, what are you gonna do with the winners?

  


Well, first off, I'll have some sort of award for them. It'll depend on the winner... I'm hoping to depict a scene from their story on the award. Second, I'll be writing the award ceremony in fanfiction form. I'll have "snippets" from the nominated stories, and it'll just be cuter than anything.

  


Send those nominations on in, and please, don't review with them! But do review, lol.

  


  


The 2002 Hey Arnold Fanfiction Awards!

  


Best Over All Author: This is the one author that you love the most. You don't just love one or two Hey Arnold stories by them, but all of them.

  


Best General Story: Best story from the "General" section.

  


Best Humor Story: Best story from the "Humor" section.

  


Best Action/Adventure story: Best story from the Action/Adventure section

  


Best Mystery story: Best story from the Mystery section

  


Best Si Fi, Fantasy or Supernatural story: Best story from the Science Fiction or Fantasy or Supernatural (Only 8 stories in this category. Wow, eh?)

  


Best Angst story: Best story from the angst section

  


Best Romance does not exist. Why? Too many stories! 

  


So, we have...

  


Best Gerald/ Phoebe Romance

  


Best Helga/Arnold Romance

  


Best Unlikely Romance (Helga/Gerald, Arnold/Phoebe, Helga/Made up Character, Brainy and Miss Matched (Joking, Joking... :-D) so on and so forth)

  


Best Minor Character Romance: (PeaPod Kid and Nadine, stuff of that sort!)

  


Other Awards...

  


Best Soliloquy: Best story featuring mostly one character talking to his or her self, and revealing their thoughts without addressing a listener. 

  


Saddest Story: Story that made you cry and think at the same time

  


Most Meaningful: A story who's lesson can also be used in real life.

  


Best Short Story: A one shot that left you saying "Woah"

  


Best Song Fic: A story who's song is woven in perfectly with the story.

  


Daydreamer's Award: This one has special meaning to me, so there will be three, yes, three Daydream award winners. These three coveted awards will be given to the stories that you stayed up late at night thinking about. Yes, you may nominate three stories.

  


  


Note: Horror is disqualified because the one story submitted is two words long.

Suspense is disqualified because no stories are from this year.

  


  


Remember, send in your lists to miss_matched@hotmail.com

  


Oh, and review for this story, too?

  


  


  


Until next chapter (Oooh, what is Dr. Bliss planning? And why does Arnold act so mean in Helga's dream?),

  


_Miss Matched_

  



	3. Chapter Two: Sore

Flawed

By Miss Matched

Chapter Two: Sore

  


  


"Helga!" Phoebe exclaimed as her best friend walked up to the table. It was lunch time, and Helga had finally showed up at school. Naturally, her best friend was worried to death; usually Helga would have called before school started had she been sick. "Are you okay?"

  


Helga sighed, physically worn out. "Yeah, Pheebs. Just..." She slumped down into the nearest chair. "Actually, I don't wanna talk about it."

  


"Changing subject!" Phoebe sang out, picking at the food on her tray. "Well, Mr. Simmons announced this morning that we'd have a new 'Uniquely You' project this week. He promised that he'd tell us exactly what it was after lunch." She smiled broadly, "Oh, Helga! Isn't it just, exhilarating?"

  


"Oh yeah, Pheebs." Helga mumbled, pulling a sandwich out of her sack lunch, "I'm all a-twitter." As she took a bite out of her sandwich, she noticed Mr. Simmons seated at a table in the corner of the lunch room. _"Funny,"_ she thought to herself, _"the fruitcup usually eats lunch in the classroom."_ She tore another piece off her sandwich and chewed at it while watching Simmons out of the corner of her eye.

  


Phoebe slunk down a bit lower in her chair. "I'll only bring this up for a moment, Helga, I promise, but you do know you can always tell me anything, right?"

  


Her chewing slowed slightly, Helga smiled. "Yeah, Phoebs. Later, I promise."

  


"Thanks, Helga!"

  


Attention fully directed back to Granola-boy, Helga watched as a woman sat down next to him. _"Oh. No."_ she thought. _"Please, no, no, no!"_

  


"Helga," Phoebe began, spearing a piece of salad, "Isn't that Dr. Bliss sitting by Mr. Simmons?" 

  


Helga groaned in reply. "This is turning out to be a _long_ day..."

  


  


The noon day sun filtered in through the open window of Mr. Simmon's fourth grade classroom. Light danced across the shiny surfaces of the desks and again off of Mr. Simmon's balding head. "Good afternoon, class!" he smiled, cheerfully. His class mumbled a response. 

  


"Now, I know how excited you are about your Uniquely You projects this week, but I'm afraid my idea has been put on hold." Some pupils cheered at that. Mr. Simmons laughed. "Now, now, class, there will still be a project!" The classroom door swung open, and Dr. Bliss walked to the front of the room.

  


"That's right. This week, your uniquely you presentations will be about one of your classmates. At the end of the week, you will do a presentation showing all of the person's good aspects in a new light." Dr. Bliss explained. "Now, Mr. Simmons will read off the list of partners."

  


"Naidene and Sid," Mr. Simmons read out over the classes murmuring, "Harold and Rhonda, Gerald and Phoebe, Naidene and Sheena, Park and Robert, Gerald and Phoebe..."

  


  


Helga slunk down in her seat as Mr. Simmons continued to read off names. _"Great, the doctor and the fruit cup are in this together. They'd better not have put me up with...."_

  


"And Helga and Arnold!"

  


_"My life is over..."_

  


  


  


  


  


  


  


  


  


  


  


  


  


  


  


  


  


  


  



	4. Chapter Three: Skinned Knees

**Flawed**

_by Miss Matched _

  


_But under _

_**Skinned Knees**_

_and the skid marks._

_Past the places where you used to learn..._

______________

_Chapter 3_

______________

  


  


Arnold blinked thrice, then stared up at Mr. Simmons as if he expected his teacher to retract that final pairing. The whole class room was alive with chatter and movement as Mr. Simmons tried to quiet the class down.

  


"Now, class," He smiled, speaking over the top of the excited students. Most ignored him. Harold chased Sid around the room, telling him that he'd better take back whatever he'd just said. Gerald and Phoebe moved their desks next to each other, eager to begin, and Curly was on top of his desk, shouting about how he wanted to be paired up with his sock puppet, Mini Curl. 

  


"Class!" Mr. Simmons tried again, just a bit louder. Dr. Bliss, calm as always, stepped in front of the frustrated teacher. 

  


"If you don't listen to your teacher, I'm afraid you'll all be sent to my office so we can discuss why you treat your teacher so poorly, and perhaps find ways to remedy the situation." She suggested, her voice barely above a whisper. The chaos that had reigned only moments before stopped, everyone seemingly frozen in place, including Curly, who was kissing his sock puppet. 

  


"Awww, you're confusing me!" Harold called out, breaking the silence. Everyone else had gotten the point, as desks straightened out, and people returned to them. Finally, Harold too sat in his seat, muttering something about getting Sid later.

  


Mr. Simmons blushed, and looked back at Dr. Bliss, "Thanks. Usually they're not so... high strung."

  


Dr. Bliss laughed, "Well, they're a very special group of kids. I'd like to see more of them."

  


"Well, you're always welcome to visit, Doctor!" Mr. Simmons assured her. "But fear not, I'll be keeping extra 'special' tabs on them."

  


Dr. Bliss laughed, then waved at the class, "Until tomorrow, students." she announced as she walked out of the room. Helga, throughout all this, made no sound at all, and remained down in her seat.

  


"Gawrsh, Helga!" Stinky exclaimed from the seat behind her, "Are you okay?" Helga didn't reply, just stared ahead with a foreign expression on her face. "Hot dang! She musta passed out on accounta she always gets paired up with Arnold and hates him more then chopped liver that's been left out too long!"

  


"Stinky..." Helga whispered. You could see Stinky's ears perk up, and he bent over his desk to talk to her.

  


"Yes, Miz Helga?"

  


"I need.... I need...."

  


"Yes?" He bent in further.

  


"FOR YOU TO SHUT UP!" She shouted right into his ear. Mr. Simmons, who had been happily typing away at his computer before this, looked up and away from the screen.

  


"Helga, that reminds me. You have an appointment with Dr. Bliss. Don't worry about a pass, Mr. Wartz says that you can go down there whenever you 'specially' want to!"

  


The class began a chorus of "ooohs" as Helga marched angrily out of the room. 

  


______________

  


Closing her eyes, Dr. Sylvia Bliss inhaled the fragrance of mint tea. It had always been her favorite, ever since childhood, when her mother would make a cup after a cold winter's day at school. It would always be waiting for her on the front table, piping hot, even when her mother wouldn't. Sometimes a little note would be tucked underneath the saucer. "I'll be back at midnight, as will your father. Love, mother." A breeze whipped through her office, causing her to look up from her chipped cup of tea. It had been the door, opened quickly and violently at that. The angry blonde who had entered slammed the door shut, and marched further into Dr. Bliss' janitor's closet turned office. 

  


"You called?" Helga asked, voice biting with sarcasm.

  


Dr. Bliss turned in her chair to face Helga. "As a matter of fact, I did. Do you want to use the couch this session, or the chair in the corner?"

  


Helga sighed, knowing that fighting wasn't going to help her situation. "I'll take the couch. I didn't sleep too well last night, but of _course_, you know that all ready. What were you doing in my house."

  


"It's your mother's house too, Helga, and she called me. You had been yelling in your sleep for a little bit short of a half an hour, and she was afraid of waking you up."

  


Helga folded her arms over her chest as she huffed down into the black leather couch. "Okay, but I didn't invite you to mess around with my life today. What was up with that, Doc?"

  


Dr. Bliss pulled out a notebook. "According to my records, this week you were going to work on getting to know Arnold better. You said that last time we met, didn't you, Helga?"

  


Helga looked taken aback. "Well, yeah, but..."

  


"And find flaws in him."

  


"But..."

  


"So I figured you should try it for a grade."

  


Helga crossed her legs and stared at the shrink. "I didn't ask for your help, you know. I can go make a fool out of myself searching for the impossible without your 'guidance'."

  


"Well, at least the ball's rolling now." Dr. Bliss calmly stated, flipping her notebook open to a new page. "So, Helga, tell me about this dream you had."

  


Fidgiting, Helga pondered for a moment what to say. "I dreamt that I was home alone and we were out of toilet paper."

  


"...Helga..."

  


"You have to admit, it's a pretty scary thought."

  


Dr. Bliss sighed, tapping her pencil on the side of her notebook, "The sooner you tell the truth, the sooner you'll be out of here."

  


Helga scoffed, "And face those chuckleheads back in Simmons's class? Forget it, I'm camping out here."

  


"Well, that's sad, because you're supposed to meet Arnold at his house to start on the project tonight..." The shrink began, "But if you don't tell me what's going on in that busy head of yours, you won't get to start."

  


"You wouldn't." Helga stated, arching an eyebrow.

  


"Do you want to try me?" Dr. Bliss countered, pencil poised, knowing she had found her patient's soft spot. 

  


Helga sighed, falling back onto the couch, and told Dr. Bliss the whole story.

  


"... and after that, I woke up only to see Mirium hanging over me and you fiddling with my radio!"

  


Dr. Bliss' pencil had long since broken, and she had finished taking her three pages of notes with a stray pen she found on her desk. "Well, Helga, let me give this a try."

  


"Does it look like I'm stopping you?" Helga spit out, still miffed at the day's happenings.

  


"Well, I think you wanted a right out answer from Arnold. You admitted these feelings that you've harbored for him so long, and you wanted to know how he felt about this. Instead, in an attempt to salvage your own pride, he swept the whole event under the rug, as your family so often does to their problems. You're used to your family's opinions of you, which you believe are rather unfavorable, and are positioning those feelings on Arnold. Think I just about have it?"

  


"I... I don't know." Helga admitted.

  


Dr. Bliss smiled, "Well, there's another thing for you to hash over this week." Just then, the bell rang. "And you're free to leave the school! Have a nice day."

  


"Thanks, Doc." Helga said, managing to put a half smile on her face as she walked out the door. Inside, she was furious at herself, and yet doubtful._"I wouldn't blame my family's faults on Arnold, dear, sweet, innocent Arnold, would I?"_

  


  


_**AN: Well, there you go, all of y'all requesting a long chapter. Next chapter will be the same length. I really like using lyrics in the titles, so expect that from now on. I've got some great ones, lol. Chapter three's title is from Everything You Want, by Vertical Horizon, which almost everyone knows I'm semi-obsessed with. Until next weekend, I'm...**_

  


_**Miss Matched**_


	5. Chapter Four: Break

**Flawed**

_by Miss Matched _

  


_I'm here, waiting for something new to _

_**Break**_

_my heart..._

______________

_Chapter 4_

______________

  


The sky shone a bright, cloudless blue as Helga raced from the school building. Her appointment with Dr. Bliss made her late out of school, and the bus had drove on without her. "I can't *huff* be late *pant* to Arnold's." She panted, racing down the sidewalk and pushing random innocent bystanders out of her way. Finally, she was at the boarding house.

  


Putting her hands on her knees and leaning up against the old brick building, Helga caught her breath. As she did so, she thought about Dr. Bliss' interpretation of her dream. She was angry at her self at the possibility of blaming her dear, sweet...

  


"Have a nice jog?"

  


"ARNOLD?!" Helga gasped, turning to face him, "I mean, don't sneak up on me while I'm trying to catch my breath, football head."

  


He sighed, and looked down at the pavement. "Sorry, Helga. I'm glad you came, though. I honstly thought that Dr. Bliss would forget to tell you to come over."

  


Helga moved away from the wall, as she felt cornered at the moment. "Well, she didn't, doi. Why else would she carry a pad of paper around?"

  


Arnold shook his head, there was no use fighting the issue. "Well, I'll get the door." He ran up the stairs, and Helga followed. Gentlemanly, Arnold held the door open.

  


"I can open the door myself, thank you very much." Helga fumed, stomping inside. 

  


"You're welcome." He mumbled, walking inside and shutting the door behind him. How was he ever going to survive a whole week of projects with Helga?

  


He mentally shook himself as he walked into the living room, where Helga was standing. He knew she could be nice... there was another side to Helga that she rarely ever showed.

"You can sit down, you know." Arnold said, motioning to the dusty old couch. "Sure, it doesn't look conformable, but looks can be deceiving."

Helga raised an eyebrow in response. "I think I'd rather the floor." She mumbled, plopping down on the well worn carpet. Silence reigned for a few minutes, with Arnold simply standing there, and Helga dragging a finger across the shaggy carpet. 

"You know, it's just the two of us here." Arnold said, breaking the silence. Helga blushed and looked down.

"Yeah, so?"

"Come on, Helga. Let's make it a trues. We need this assignment to get done... and truthfully, I know you're not as angry and heard hearted as you act. Come on, take off the mask, please? For me?"

  


Helga pondered over this for a few moments, then looked up. "Fine fine, Arnoldo... er, Arnold. Only because I care about my grades, not because of you. Got it?"

  


"Whatever you say, Helga." Arnold smiled in response.

  


"So, what part of the 'Special' assignment is due for tomorrow?" Helga quipped, wiggling her fingers while she said "Special".

  


Arnold sat down on the couch, across from Helga. "Well, we just have to talk about anything we want to, then write up a few words about it for tomorrow."

  


"Sounds easy enough... what's the catch?"

  


Arnold laughed, "Well, no catch... although he said it would be awfully 'Special' if someone wrote a poem for their 

paper..."

  


Helga rolled her eyes, "Of course he would say that..." She twiddled her thumbs for a moment, then let out a short laugh. "So, then. We need something to talk about."

  


Arnold thought for a moment, fiddling with a pillow that was next to him. Honestly, this whole situation was ackward. How was he supposed to make conversation with Helga? After knowing her for years, he barely knew a inkling about her. "How about..." He looked up on a wall at a row of pictures. His eyes settled on one of him and his grandpa in front of the Grand Canyon. "How about family vacations?"

  


"Sounds harmless enough." Helga admitted. "I guess I'll start." With that, she began retelling what was supposed to be a trip to her grandmothers house. "... And Mirium lost all her money. Left the purse on top of the car when she drove off."

  


"You're kidding!" Arnold was down on the floor by now, and Helga was laying on the pillow that he had been fiddling with earlier.

  


"Does it look like I'm kidding? Anyhow, so she borrows my money, then enters a mechanical bull riding competition!" Helga sat up at this point. "Who would have thought she woulda beat all of those professionals. So, she got the car fixed with the money from the competition. And that was my family vacation. How about yours?"

  


Arnold got up and walked over to the wall. Standing on his tiptoes, he reached the picture he was looking at earlier. He pulled it down, and handed it to Helga. "A few summers back, Grandpa and Grandma treated the boarders and me to a trip to the Grand Canyon. It was so beautiful..." He closed his eyes and kept talking, "The sunsets were just beautiful, like someone had climbed up to the highest point on earth and painted it." He laughed, "Okay, so I'm not the best at similes, but you get the point."

  


Helga laughed, "Sounds good to me. Keep goin', keep goin'."

  


"Well, anyhow, looking back on it, there's so much that I learned from that trip. One drop of water started to carve that canyon. I guess I just think about that when people say that they can't make a difference... because maybe if that one drop of water hadn't fallen, maybe the canyon would have never been formed." He stood up to hang the picture back up on it's nail. "Some people just stop trying to make a difference because they don't think it matters, or that they matter. But everyone can make a difference, Helga. Some people... all they know is hurt, but that doesn't mean that they can't help anyone... do you kind of get what I'm saying?"

  


"What are you insinuating?" Helga asked, growing angry, "Are you saying that I'm not doing enough for people? Do you think that I can't feel? Ha!"

  


"What?" Arnold gasped. He hadn't meant to make her angry. "No, no, I didn't mean that. I wasn't--"

  


"Just because you're so giving doesn't mean that you need to raise the bar for the rest of us. Some of us just aren't as pure as you, bucko. Deal with it." With that she got up and stormed out of the boarding house, leaving behind a startled Arnold.

  


"What did I say?"

  


Meanwhile outside, Helga began her walk home. "Stupid prying football head." she mumbled. She really didn't want to talk to him... it was hard to. How can you really talk to someone who won't tell you how they feel about you?

  


______________

  


"Oookay, class!" Mr. Simmons smiled broadly as his students filed in after lunch. "Now it's time to hand in the first part of your 'Uniquely You' projects!" Most students moaned, some were scribbling the finishing touches, and Harold was finishing his lunch. Dr. Bliss, who planned on coming in every day after lunch for the rest of this project, picked up the student's papers. When she took Arnold and Helga's, she placed them on top of the pile. Helga saw this and groaned. 

_"When will this woman give up?!"_ Helga thought to herself. Dr. Bliss handed the pile to Mr. Simmons. Smiling even wider, if that was ever humanly possible, he held up a hand.

  


"Now I'm going to read out two very special papers! Poems, in fact! For privacy's sake, I won't name names." He began reading off the top one. 

"Tango

  


I kind of hoped progress was made.

So hard for me to figure out, you always seemed in the shade.

But just as I started to see the light

You thought that I was trying to fight.

And you're closed and cold again,

and I don't see how I can win.

  


So it's one step forward and two steps back.

Losing direction, and off the track.

My feet have been stepped on

My plans have been left un-done.

Why can't it be three steps forward and one to the side?

I wish she could see I have nothing to hide.

And no matter how hard I've tried, this I know.

All that stepping around, that's just how the tango goes."

  


Mr. Simmons paused for a few moments, as if absorbing what he had just read, then pulled out the piece of paper underneath. "And here is their partner's poem...

"Canyon

  


I'm looking up

from the bottom

of the canyon.

Looking up,

and thinking of

all that's happened.

For you see, 

the rushing river flows right through here

and carved the hard slab of stone in it's path.

  


I'm looking up

from the bottom 

of my soul.

Looking up

and wondering

who's really in control.

For you see,

My emotions can get the best of me

and carved me into who I am today.

  


And someday

I hope to fly above this

and see my canyon from up high, and not below.

And some day

The depth won't overwhelm me

As I see what I've become on my own.

  


I'm looking up

from the bottom

of the canyon of my soul.

Looking up, 

and I see you.

Your hand is out for me to hold.

"Come rise above"

you say, "Just take my hand

And I'll be waiting until the day that you understand...

  


And someday

I'll help you fly above this.

Oh, someday you'll be free from the fortress that you made.

Yes, someday,

If you will just believe me

I will help you find a better way."

  


At this point, Mr. Simmons was actually wiping away tears. "Um, early recess!" He called out, and the classroom emptied quickly. "Dr. Bliss, we need to talk."

  


  


AN: Sorry for the major suckage... this chapter sucked with the power and fervor of... dunno. It just bit.


	6. Chapter Five: Callous Laden

  


  


**Flawed**

_By Miss Matched_

_So_

_**Callous Laden**_

_that I can't feel a thing at all..._

_______________

_Chapter 5_

_______________

  


  


Tiny black leather shoes made soft pattering noises on the tiled bathroom floor as Phoebe walked up to a stall. No legs could be seen from underneath, but Phoebe knew better. 

  


"Helga? I know you're in there." She said meekly. 

  


"No Helga in here, just Telly the toilet." Helga interjected sarcastically. 

  


Beginning to get impatient, Phoebe tapped one foot on the green tiled floor. "Helga, it's recess time. **Early** recess time. We rarely get this... I've calculated it out to be a one in five thousand chance that it will ever happen again. You've simply got to go outside!"

  


Helga sighed, "No. I'm in here for a reason, you know."

  


Phoebe snickered slightly, "But Helga, I think you've been in there too long to just be, um, doing you duty." The sound of what could only be Helga's head hitting against the stall door was heard. Afraid of Helga actually hurting herself, she quickly spoke again. "It's really not a big deal that yours and Arnold's poems were read in front of class." Some more banging noises were heard from the stall, then silence. Phoebe watched as Helga slipped her legs down to where they could be seen. Phoebe sighed with relief, hoping that Helga would agree to leave the restroom. But just then, Helga spun around in the stall so her heels faced the outside. The sound of the toilet flushing rang out. 

  


"I hope she's not giving herself a swirly!" Phoebe thought to herself, "Though highly improbable..." Fearing the worst, she got on her hands and knees and proceeded to climb under the stall door. 

  


"Stupid, stinking poetry." Helga grumbled, wadding up a piece of paper and chucking it into the toilet. She pushed down on the lever, and the toilet flushed once more. Phoebe gasped, this was worse than a dunk in the porcelain, this was the destruction of art! She grabbed Helga's arm as she was about to throw another page in. Helga spun around, surprised. 

"How did you get in here?"

  


"I crawled underneath." Phoebe stated briefly, "Why are you flushing your poems down the latrine?"

  


Helga growled, "Not that it's any of your business, but no one was supposed to know that those were my and Arnold's poems. I'm just getting rid of the other drafts."

  


"Helga, I'm your best friend! That's how I was able to tell that one of the poems was yours. Due to the fact that you are Arnold's partner, it was easy to assume that the other poem was his. I'm sure no one else noticed."

  


"Are you sure?" Helga asked, raising half a unibrow, "Because I'd hate to have to break in a new best friend if you're wrong."

  


"I'm relatively positive."

  


Calming down, Helga folded the rest of the papers in her hand and stuffed them in her pocket. "Come on, Phoebes. It's recess time." She opened up the stall door and walked out.

  


"Coming!" Phoebe sang after her.

  


Meanwhile, the rest of the class was already outside enjoying the mild weather. Though the sun shone brightly across the playground, the heat felt friendly instead of overbearing. Only a few minutes remained before regular recess time when the other children came out, so the fourth graders were quickly trying to monopolize as much of the playground as humanly possible. Sid, Stinky and Harold each sat down on a four square court, Rhonda and Robert snagged the swings, Brainy held onto the tether ball pole, and Curly hung from the jungle gym while plotting to free Michael Jackson's pet monkey. 

  


"Come on Arnold," Gerald said as he walked up behind his best friend, "There's still a few good balls we can save."

  


Arnold sighed, "I don't really feel like playing right now, Gerald."

  


"Mmm mmm MMMM." Replied Gerald, shaking his head and clicking his tongue, "This isn't over the whole poem thing, is it?"

  


"Gerald!" Arnold exclaimed, astonished, "How did you..."

  


"I'm your best friend. We're like this." He crossed his fingers for effect. "I know these things. And let me tell you, you'd better watch yourself. As soon as Helga comes out here, you're gonna be in for the beating of your life! I hear Sid and Harold are gonna back you up, though. I think Stinky still has it in for Helga, but I'm sure we can--"

  


Arnold interrupted, "No, she's not going to beat me up, Gerald. That's crazy talk."

  


"Is it crazy talk to say that she's made fun of you more than anyone else in this class combined?"

  


"Well... no..."

  


"And that she constantly picks on you and torments you?"

  


"Um..."

  


"And that she hates your guts and wishes you were dead?"

  


Arnold turned away, "Now that one's crazy talk." He mumbled under his breath. Gerald heard this, and shook his head once more.

"What's up with you, man? Ever since we saved the neighborhood I feel like something's different, something big. It's like... it's like we're not even best friends any more." He began to walk away, "But I trust your judgment, Arnold, you're a bold kid... but like I said, just watch yourself. You're too good for your own good sometimes."

  


Arnold sighed as his best friend left. No one understood Helga... not even him. But there was truth to Gerald's words, something was different now, though he couldn't place his finger on it. But there was a sneaking suspicion in the back of his mind that whatever it was, it had been changing for a long time.

  


The rest of the children restlessly zipped out of their classrooms as soon as the recess bell rang. The culmination of childhood joys, this was the best time of their days. The sunlight hit their faces as they ran outside, illuminating...

  


utter chaos.

  


"Get off the jungle gym you wussy fourth grader!" That was Wolfgang, Arnold decided, while not looking.

"Never! Michael Jackson's pets deserve freedom!" And that was Curly, no doubt.

  


"What? Just get off the monkey bars before pound you into the little fourth grade mush you are."

"You and your fifth grade stooges get the jungle gym every day and don't share. Criminy, will one day really kill you? Let the little weirdo have some fun." Arnold turned around at this. Helga was standing up for Curly. While a part of him wanted to be surprised at this, he wasn't. 

  


"Well well, it's the ugly girl with the one eyebrow. The girls playing with their dolls are over on that side of the playground." He pointed, taunting. 

  


Helga growled, and held up her fist. Knowing that he'd have to act fact, Arnold ran over to the nearest adult, Mr. Buttsavage. "Excuse me, but one of your students is about to start a fight."

  


"Oh my!" Mr. Buttsavage replied, his eyebrows raised. "I'd better go over there! WOLFGANG!" He shouted running over to the hulking fifth grader. Arnold smirked slightly, evidently he was used to this sort of behavior from his students. He looked back over at the scene. The teacher had grabbed Wolfgang by the wrist and dragged him off, leaving an especially peeved Helga and insane Curly in their wake. 

  


"Are you two okay?" Arnold asked, double checking on the well-being of his peers.

Helga snorted, "I was doing just fine on my own, football head. I didn't need you to bring any chump over."

  


"But I thought you were---"

  


"In trouble?" Helga finished for him. "Heh, right. I know Wolfgang's style pretty well. Without anyone watching him or chiding him on, he backs down pretty easily. Now everyone's gonna think I'm a pansy, that I can't fight my own fights."

  


Arnold sighed, "You don't think I can do anything right when it comes to you, do you?"

  


Helga paused, then changed the subject, "I wonder what the Fruitcup is going to assign us for tonight."

  


"Yeah, whatever it is it's bound to be interesting."

  


"Right."

  


Inside, Mr. Simmons and Dr. Bliss were still talking about the projects. About one group in particular, actually.

  


"I just don't think we should force them together, Dr. Bliss." Mr. Simmons began.

  


"Sylvia, please if you would. You don't need to be formal with me, Robert."

  


He scratched his head nervously, "Right... Sylvia. It's just that, well, they're only nine. I feel that if they're really going to be friends, it's their own decision. It's all the more 'special' when they realize that themselves. Isn't it?"

  


"Not when it's ruining one person's life. Helga has Phoebe, but she needs someone a bit more... stable to be with. Helga and Phoebe's friendship is more about dominance, about brains versus brawns, they end up clashing when they step out of their cliqued boxes that they prepared for themselves."

  


"Well, why Arnold? Why not someone else?"

  


"Robert, you've read Helga's poems. You're not blind. She needs to know that he at least cares back. Being on at least friendly terms with him would take away her need to be so aggressive. Besides, though I've never done an evaluation on Arnold, I have a hunch that he needs her."

  


Robert Simmons sighed, "I guess I do see your point, Doctor, but I wish that it wouldn't take so much to get them to see the light. It looks like it's really hurting Helga."

  


"When a bone breaks and heals wrong, it needs to be broken again and given the chance to heal right. Helga's chosen some wrong tactics to deal with her feelings, and once she's broken she'll be given a chance to correct herself."

  


Just then the bell rang, letting the students back inside from recess. Knowing it would take a while for the reluctant students to return to class, Mr. Simmons turned back to Dr. Bliss.

  


"Well, it's your turn to assign the next part of the project..."

  


"Don't worry, I'm sure it'll be to your approval."

  


"Right, right." Mr. Simmons laughed, then noted "I don't usually give the students this much homework."

  


As the students trickled back in, she smiled, "I have a hunch that they're enjoying it far more than you expect."

  


As Helga walked inside, she sighed. She hated herself for the way she had been treating Arnold. It was like the closer he got, the farther she pushed away. Had she become that unfeeling? She looked down, not wanting to know the answer.

  


_(AN: A short, blink and you miss it tribute to my man Chief was included in this chapter. Yeah, really short. Check out his stories. I'll try and be more... um, on time with the chapters from now on. And yeah, I did re-upload this chapter. Huge continuity error. -_-() )_

  


_Until Next Time,_

  


_Miss Matched)_


	7. Interlude

  


**Flawed**

_By Miss Matched_

_______________

_Interlude_

_______________

  


  


"I must say how impressed I was with your papers." Dr. Bliss began as the class sat down. The long recess had them antsy and longing once again for the outdoors. Many students were squirming in their chairs, and Curly was attempting to sneak out the window without being noticed. Luckily, Mr. Simmons caught this and began to pull him back down. Curly didn't put up much of a fight, but did say that the blood of the monkeys would be on Mr. Simmons' balding head. Dr. Bliss cleared her throat to direct attention back to her at the front of the room. 

  


"Yes, there will be another assignment." Dr. Bliss continued, looking down at her papers. "Yes Stinky, it's due tomorrow, and no Harold, it doesn't involve food." Those two raised hands went back down. "Your job will be to compile in the most interesting way that you can think of, a list of things about your partner that not many people know. I will check to see that it is done tomorrow, but you will not turn it in. On Friday you may use it as a part of your presentations. Does that make sense?" The room suddenly became dead-silent except for the sound of Brainy's persistent, asthmatic breathing. Dr. Bliss smiled. "I'll take that as a 'yes'. Until tomorrow, children!" She picked up her folders as she said this, and walked out the door, unaware of a small piece of pink paper that came fluttering down from the stack.

  


Gerald gave Arnold a small, knowing smile as the good doctor left, then walked over to Phoebe's chair. Placing his hand on her shoulder, they walked over to two free desks at the other side of the room to begin the next phase of the project. After she sat down, Phoebe glanced over to Helga and gave her a thumbs up. Nervously, Helga walked over to Arnold's desk. As she was walking, Arnold grabbed the desk next to him and dragged it across from his own. Gathering his courage, he finally spoke.

  


"Truse again?" His eyes were hopeful, yet worried at the same time. Helga nodded.

  


"Truse again." She confirmed as she sat down. "So Football head... um, I mean..."

  


Arnold laughed, "It's okay. I'll survive."

  


"Um, right." Helga answered back nervously, looking down at her hands. Finally she broke the silence again. "Look, I'm sorry. It's just---- I don't know! I just..." She growled, and banged her hands against the desk, then laughed. "I don't know what do to with myself!" Unfortunately, these actions drew quite a bit of attention to herself. She turned in her chair and shook Old Betsy until finally people returned to their own conversations. 

  


"I don't exactly know what you're talking about, Helga." Arnold admitted, taken aback at the display.

  


Helga leaned forward in her chair with her arms resting on the oak surface of the desk, trying to calm herself down. Her right hand began to rub against her left arm, a nervous habit she'd gained from over the years. "I don't know how to handle myself around you. It's conflicting emotions, but I don't know why." She paused for a few moments as those words hung uneasily in the air. "And if you ever tell anyone that I told you that, I'll... I'll..." she crossed her arms over her chest huffily, realizing that she didn't know what she'd do. "I'll do... something."

  


For once in nine longs years, Arnold had the upper hand. The power that the female bully over him had been lifted, leaving her vulnerable, a mere shadow of herself. The facade she'd put up so long ago was peeling away as she clumsily tried to cling to it. Arnold knew that if he ever wanted to reach through to her, now would be the time. But just as those thoughts passed through his mind, a new set replaced them. 

  


"Helga, it's okay, you can forget about what happened on the FTI building." It took him a while to get those words out for fear that someone else would hear them. Leaning forward, he continued, speaking slowly, softly and rhythmically as if telling a story to a frightened child. "This'll be the last time I'll ever mention it; it doesn't change my opinion of you, I promise." He chided her gently as he put his hand atop hers. "Remember? We got caught up in the moment, you still hate me. I'll never forget that." He alluded to the very words she had told him that day with a wink of his own. "Now, come on. Let's get this project done."

  


Arnold's words hit Helga like a smack in the face, but she bit her tongue. And while she did so, something did crumble. Not the facade she'd worn so long, but her heart.

  


  


_(AN: Please no one kill me! Or maim me, or anything of the like. I began this as chapter six, but then realized that it would do better on it's own. The next chapter will be the most important of the entire story so far. So, hang in there. I'll have the next chapter up before I leave to Colorado, hopefully.)_


	8. Chapter Six: Fall

**Flawed**

  


_So _

_will _

_you _

_catch _

_my_

_**Fall?**_

_**__________________**_

Chapter 6

_**__________________**_

  


  


The ever-present sound of "The Wheel" greeted Helga's ears is she entered her house after school.

  


"NO YOU MORON!" Big Bob sputtered from his Laz-E-Boy. "Y! Y! THE WORD IS YESTERDAY!"

  


"Um, m?" the voice on the TV answered tentatively. Helga shook her head, familiar with her dad's rage against the game show. He had even bought satellite TV just to have that new "The Wheel" channel: All Wheel, all the time. Paying no more mind, she ascended the stairs to her room.

  


She darted into her closet with the look of an ashamed child on her face. "I can't let Arnold see this." She mumbled, glaring at her newest shrine made out of earthen clay. She had to break into the school one night to fire it in the kiln in the art room, but it had all been worth it. At least, it had been.

  


But that was not the issue at the moment. The issue was that for one reason or another, the boarding house wasn't going to be open to visitors (Arnold was vague as to the reason why), so they had to meet at her house. The TV room was out for obvious reasons, namely Big Bob, and the kitchen was off limits because Miriam would probably be mixing up an extra batch of her "special" smoothies to drown out Bob's hollering. So the meeting place would have to be her room, the very room cluttered with artifacts detailing her own infatuation with him. Working quickly, she threw the shrine in two plastic garbage bags and placed it rather unceremoniously underneath her bed. After all of her pink books into another plastic bag she discarded them under her bed also. She glanced around her room, trying to think if she had another object that would give her secret away. 

  


Secret. She laughed out loud at that one. What planet was she living on now? She had no secret anymore. So much time had been spent to worrying that Lila or Dr. Bliss or even Brainy would tell the world her secret passion that she had never even paused to think that one day she would crack under the pressure of her duel life and betray herself! "Stupid, stupid STUPID!" she yelled at herself for nearly the millionth time in that single day alone. Her head swam with the imbalance of love and hate that had risen up in her heart. She had always hated Arnold to a certain extent, though miniscule compared to her own love for him. But this hate, this pent up frustration due to his own... footballheaded ignorance was growing. All this time, she had thought that he was... different. Sure, she knew he was a little dense, but not completely blind! Or heartless. Or cruel. Or hateful. Or... Looking down at her hands, she realized that her fists were clinched. "Ease up, old girl. Just play it cool, try and get along, try and get along..." But there was an ache inside... and she knew he had fallen. Arnold had fallen from the pedestal she had placed him on all those years ago. Now he was only a boy, not a godlike figure. The ringing of the doorbell shook her from her revelation. In a rush, she flung her door open and flew down the stairs. "Bob and Miriam had better not have..." She trailed off. "answered the door." The door had already been opened, and both Arnold and Miriam were engaged in a seemingly one sided conversation.

  


"Good evening Mrs. Pataki. May I please see Helga? We're supposed to work on our class project and-"

  


"Huh?" Miriam blinked, dazed. She took another long sip of her tanish colored smoothie. "Oh, you're Helga's little friend. Yeah, go on upstairs to her room and..."

  


"Are you sure you want me up there?" Arnold asked, feeling slightly uncomfortable.

  


Big Bob took this exact moment to butt in. "Yeah Miriam, are you sure you want Orphan boy up in the kid's room? I mean, a kid like that could--"

  


"CRAM IT, BOB." Helga hollered as she ran down the stairs, a pad of paper and a pen in hand. "You don't talk to him like that. Criminy, he just saved the whole neighborhood and your business. If it weren't for him, you'd be licking Sheck's boots. Come on Arnold, let's blow this Popsicle stand." She grabbed his arm and led the stunned boy out of the Pataki household.

  


The night air felt cool against Helga's face as she angrily marched around the corner. "Anywhere you wanna go then, Arnoldo?" she asked, looking down. Her small hand was still clutching his arm to the point that her knuckles had turned white. Arnold was biting his lip, and she realized that she was hurting him. Letting go, she apologized. "I'm sorry."

  


"It's all right." These words came so often from Arnold's mouth. He was so quick to brush off and to forgive, but this time the words seemed almost foreign and strained rolling off his tongue. His face almost mirrored Helga's: angry and yet freezing cold; an untouchable. Helga shivered, "Wow, it's kinda cold out here, isn't it?" 

  


"Slightly." Arnold agreed. Uncomfortable silence settled over them for the next few moments. 

  


"So, where are we heading?" Helga asked. Arnold's step size increased and he pulled in front of Helga. 

  


"Anywhere to get this done, right?"

  


Helga bit her lip. "Yeah, don't want to drag this out too long. We'd probably kill each other."

  


"We? Don't you mean you'd kill me with another display of your amazing, uncontrolled anger?" His voice was steady, and he tried to play it off as a joke. The lightness of his sweet voice was gone, all that was left was the sharp edge. 

  


_"You deserve that... play it off. You can do it, old girl."_ she reminded herself, then took a deep breath. "Okay, I'll give you that one." She switched the topic quickly, trying to keep up with Arnold who was walking faster by the minute. "We could go to Slausens. We could go to the park. We could.... I dunno, sit outside the boarding house."

  


Arnold turned his head around. "Don't mention the boarding house." he mumbled in that still cold tone.

  


"Right, right, I won't mention the bo--- um, how about Slausens then? Sure will be warmer in there than it is out here." She had to break into a slight jog at this point in order to keep up with him. 

  


"Fine then." He said shortly while he turned the corner. Helga followed suit, matching her stride to keep up with his, but keeping in mind to still remain behind him. The rest of the walk was silent apart from the echoing sound of rubber soles smacking the pavement. After what seemed like eternity (though only 15 minutes by Helga's watch), they reached Slausens. Arnold slid into the first booth next to the door, and Helga sat down on the other side of the same booth. She put her notebook down on the table and placed her pen next to it. 

  


"Okay." Helga said, attempting to keep a note of cheerfulness in her voice. It didn't work, as her voice came out in a high pitched squeak. Clearing her throat, she continued. "A list of interesting or not widely known facts about each other." She pulled the cap off of her purple pen with her teeth and scribbled the heading onto the paper. "Who should go first?"

  


Arnold sighed, looking down at his folded hands. "Look Helga, before we start, I think I-"

  


"Well look who's here!" a voice said from the front counter. "And looking so cold! Hang on, I'll get you two hot cocoa, on the house." 

  


"Thanks Mrs. Johanson!" Arnold exclaimed as she brought two large mugs filled to the brim with the warm, steaming brown liquid. She had even added tiny marshmallows to the top. "But we can pay you, it's okay. I have money..."

  


Mrs. Johanson patted his hand. "It's fine Arnold. Anything for Gerald's friends." Then in a lower voice, she added, "You're okay then, honey?" His shoulders slumped and he meekly nodded. After giving him a quick hug, Gerald's mother announced that she'd be in the back cleaning up, and that if they needed her they could just holler.

  


"Thanks again!" Helga shouted as she left. "Wow, that was nice of her."

  


"I suppose."

  


"Suppose? The woman just gave us free drinks! She must be, like, a saint! I didn't know she worked here though. She still working at the supermarket?"

  


Arnold gave a half smile. "Yeah, she is. This is just a temporary job for a little extra money while she can still be on her feet. She'll have to give leave to both jobs when she's further into her... um... pregnancy."

  


Leaning back into her seat, Helga smiled, "Well, well, well, Gerald's going to have another little sibling. I bet he's thrilled." This last part was said with a bit of sarcasm. It was no secret that there was no love lost between Timberly and Gerald for the most part, though they could act human to each other some times.

  


"Actually, he is excited. He's bought Madame Blanch's stock of lucky charms and rabbit feet. He really wants it to be a boy this time."

  


Helga laughed. "I couldn't imagine why." Was her sarcastic answer.

  


Her laughter caused Arnold to crack a smile too. "Well, I guess we'd better start then... how about we list what we know everyone knows about us first."

  


"Okay." Helga responded, placing her pen cap to the side of her cup of cocoa. "Well, you're a football head, everyone knows that."

  


"And you're a pink bow wearing bully."

  


"Goody two shoes."

  


"Fist namer."

  


"Teacher's pet."

  


"Vindictive spirit."

  


The list grew slowly into more of a name calling, and their voices rose with every addition.

  


"Paste for brains."

  


"Not nice person!"

  


"Can't stand to lose!" Helga shot back.

  


This one took Arnold slightly by surprise. "That's not true."

  


Helga paused for a moment to think. "Well, yeah it is. Didn't you know it?"

  


Arnold crossed his arms. "Oh come on Helga! You're the one who can't stand to lose. That's why you're so mean all the time, you're afraid of losing something!"

  


"Why am I your project, Arnold?" 

  


He blinked. "What do you mean?"

  


Helga grabbed her cup of cocoa with a shaky hand. She took a long sip, then set it back down. "Why do you always want to change me? After this whole 'Save the Neighborhood' thing... I mean, you said it yourself; change isn't always good. So why me? Is it because you've already invested so much time in my pathetic existence? Is it because I'm the road block between you and your utopia? You've fixed so many problems Arnold, but I'm still like this. And you know what? I'm fine with that. I'm _me_." Mrs. Johanson peeked her head in from the other room, so Helga lowered her voice. "I know I'm selfish, Arnold, let me change my own ways, please. I mean, I'm always looking at myself and how others think upon me that I forget to broaden my scope. I've been trying to do that this week Arnold, and I think I've found something for this list about you. Is it okay if I ramble just a while longer?"

  


The anger on Arnold's face had subsided. "Please do."

  


"Remember back to the beginning of the year when we had Mrs. Slovack? She was always yelling your name, trying to bring you back from whatever la la land you were in to the real world. You were a beautiful dreamer, to use a clique. But I think you began to change after that one hot day when you started a riot against the Jolly Ollie man. Sure, it served him right for jacking up the price on his ice cream, but you hated the way that you had caused a situation to spiral out of control. 

  


"Then there was Mr. Simmon's first day." She looked over at Arnold while she continued. His eyes were focused down at his folded arms on the table. "You helped the rest of us prank him until he cried. I remember when we all ran out of the classroom to defy his orders, you were the last one out. I know you were feeling remorse then. 

  


"Since then, I've never seen that half lidded expression of yours. You've let the dreams die, and now you're stuck here with the crappy real world. You won't let yourself be a kid, don't you see? We all mess up, Arnold, and if we feel guilty, we say we're sorry. Mr. Simmons forgave us fully after we showed him how much he means to us. I mean, criminy, if Sid , Stinky and Harold tried to do good things to pay back for all the rotten things they'd done, they'd be working in the afterlife. We make mistakes, Arnold, and so we change ourselves to prevent mistakes from happening again, not try and make ourselves perfect. Aren't you tired of being the stable one? Do you ever scream? Ever lash out? Isn't it just building up inside to the point that you just want to burst?" She looked over at Arnold, who was now crying softly into his palms. He looked up as she placed a hand on his shoulder. "You've helped us this neighborhood so much, Arnold, we all owe you back. Whatever self-inflicted punishment you've put on yourself is done. Let us help you now."

  


Arnold took a deep breath. "Grandma and Grandpa haven't been doing so well lately." A few more tears escaped from his eyes, rolling down his cheeks. "The doctor's been coming to the boarding house to check up on them, and his visits have become more frequent, and every time they just keep getting sicker and sicker and... and I haven't told anyone because I didn't think--" As she moved over to the other side of the table, Helga could feel the winds of change. She embraced him, and he cried on her shoulder, finally free.

  


  


_An: I'm always afraid of ending a chapter with a resolution, because it feels like an end. But it's not, more to come. Arnold's resolved, but will Helga pick up the pieces? Tune in whenever I update again! And go read Chief's **Robert** series right away. As in now. As in you. You. Now. W00T!_

  


_Miss Matched thinks you rock._


	9. Chapter 7: LostFoundRunHide

**Flawed**

_From **Lost **and Not **Found** _

_to **Run** and not **Hide**_

_My Hand Inside Your Hand_

Chapter Seven

It was a well kept secret of hers, one she hid from behind the doors of her new, makeshift office in P.S. 118. The sound proof walls that had been installed provided a certain amount of privacy for her patients, a haven from the rest of the school. They also provided as a means for her own escape. Indeed, Dr. Bliss was a certifiable, grade A music junkie. Music blasting from a boom box (or as they were called back-in-the-day, Ghetto Blaster) filled the room as she filled out a paper about the recent project in one Mr. Simmons' class. As a part of her student-confidentiality pact, all portions of the project that had to do with her patient's direct cases had to be kept anonymous in case they accidentally fell in the wrong hands. Privacy was something that she herself clung to, it was only fair that everyone who confided in her would get the same consideration. Her black ball point pen met yellow legal pad to the throbbing beat of drums and bass pouring from her CD player.

_Analysis: While some students are just scraping their way through the project, others are putting a real, genuine, commendable effort into it. (IE: Harold and Rhonda, Gerald and Phoebe, Arnold and Helga). Side project with my patient is running as according to plan, from what I can tell. Make sure that patient's partner doesn't know about my involvement. It's a very complex situation, and knowledge of my hand in the pairing of partners may overthrow the delicate balance._

She tapped the silver metal end of her pen against her lips as she thought about that last sentence she'd scrawled. "How are they doing now?" was the question on her mind. Shaking herself from this singular thought, she finished up her notes. 

_Curly still insists that his sock puppet is his true partner and now he says it's his soul mate. Make sure to give his parents a call and see about scheduling him in for an appointment. Or five. Or a scheduled weekly slot. _

Another pause as she thought of what else to add to the page. The song on her CD ended and switched to a much calmer beat. She sang a few lyrics to herself, letting her hand trace words across the page without much thought as to what they were. Her hand moved rhythmically to the strum of the acoustic guitars, black ink flowing across a sea of yellow paper. As the song ended, she came out of her stupor and looked back down at the page. Flushed with embarrassment from the words scrawled on it, she tore it out, wadded it up, and threw it into the plastic trash can at the side of her desk. A fresh piece of paper on her desk, she started again. It would be a long night. 

Meanwhile, the paper in the trash can unfolded itself slightly, just enough for snatches of words to be seen. Though the writing was near unintelligible, one name stood out. That of Robert Simmons. 

~*~

"As you can see," Phoebe concluded, closing her black pointer up and moving away from the foam board visual aid she had been gesturing to during her report. "Myself and Gerald have learned much through this recent portion of the assignment. We have discovered not only new things about each other, but new things, though maybe not the most pleasant, about ourselves. Through the conversations that myself and Gerald have had over the past day or so, I can conclude that we have learned valuable lessons, and that our friendship has grown stronger in the process." A blush crept over her face at this, and she pushed her round, blue glasses closer to her face. 

Gerald cleared his throat, speaking up for the first time in the entire presentation. "Yeah, what she said." He added with a nod and a suave wink. The hot blush only grew wider across Phoebe's face as their class applauded them. Moments later, the front of the classroom was cleared of their visual aids, and Mr. Simmons was standing once again in the center. 

"Our next group up is Arnold and Helga." He smiled, looking down at his list of groups. He waited a few moments, the room silent. He questioned again as he looked up from his paper. "Arnold? Helga?" His eyes settled on two empty desks.

"They aren't here, Mr. Simmons." Rhonda called out from the back of the room, examining her nails. A chorus of "oohs" rose up from the class (with the exception of Curly's shout of "They've broken out of the Matrix!")

A timid clearing of her throat brought the class' attention back to Phoebe. "Um, Mr. Simmons, Arnold and Helga were both called out earlier by Dr. Bliss. I thought you had seen it?"

"Oh, well then." Mr. Simmons sighed, "I guess we'll just look forward to seeing their 'special' presentation at a later time. Now who wants to go next? Harold, how about your group?"

"Aww man!"

~*~

The rapping of a dull eraser against a pad of yellow memo paper rang out as dull thuds to the rhythm of a Jars Of Clay tune. Sitting in front of her, her most interesting patient and her pet project. Dr. Bliss could honestly say that she loved her life. Though she didn't understand what had been going on between Helga and Arnold. She had been keeping her distance to let the two work on their project in peace, but they had never been this silent before, she thought to herself. They sat like that for a while, soaking in the music, minds wandering farther and farther into the "what if"s and "maybe"s that the world had to offer, until...

"What? Cat got your tongue, Football head?"

A startled pause at the broken silence. Arnold blinked, and a half smile appeared on his face. "I hope not, I'm allergic." He cocked his head to the side and looked up at Helga. "Wouldn't my mouth swell up or something?" A glance over at Dr. Bliss, and a short laugh. "I never understood that saying, do you?"

Dr. Bliss smiled. "I should say I haven't, but then again, there's some things better left unknown." Mulling that over for a moment, along with the newfound understanding of her patients, she continued, "Or unspoken." She flipped to a clean piece of notebook paper and positioned her pencil tip right above the first line. This was going to keep getting interesting.


End file.
